waiting for someday

Do you ever find yourself longing for "someday"?

As a young(er) mom of four babies under the age of six, I often looked at the piles of toys and books and dishes and laundry and thought, "when... then... if..." At one point in my life I was searching and waiting. Waiting for something big to happen. For God to write out words in the clouds revealing to me what I'm supposed to be doing with my life, for some grand calling. "When these kids grow up, then..." I wondered what my "spiritual gifts" were. I wondered what my ministry was. I looked at all the other moms and how they served over there and did this and worked on that and felt like I was doing nothing worth while.

"When these kids grow up, then..."

Paul and Silas didn't seem to have that attitude. They were wrongfully arrested, falsely accused, beaten with metal rods tied in a bundle, and thrown into the deepest part of the prison where their legs were spread as far as they could go and their ankles put in stocks. And there they waited. For what? A trial? More beatings? Death?

I don't know what these men prayed for at midnight. If we know Paul, we can guess he was praying that God's word would not be bound, that the door to be wide open for gospel! They certainly were singing hymns of praise. And you know what? The prisoners were listening.

And when God moved, did they take off running? No, they stayed right were they were. They were instrumental in saving not only the physical life of the jailer but also his spiritual life. They spoke the word of the Lord to him! They told his family about Jesus. They baptized him.

I can get so caught up in my circumstances. Like I'm in a holding cell, waiting for my "real ministry" to begin. I overlook the ministry of my "right here and now." I get myself over-committed because I push aside my babies, looking over the tops of their heads, trying to catch a glimpse through the crowd of what I perceive to be a better ministry  "out there."

What would if have been like if Paul and Silas thought the same of the other prisoners? What if they saved their songs and prayers for when they were released?

God has placed me in a country where I am free to teach my babies at home. Free, without fear of reprisal, to teach them about how He made everything, and how He made them, about our sin and His grace, about the absolutes found in His word. God has placed in my home four babies that are sinners and need to hear His story of redemption everyday--24/7! I get to mentor them and disciple them every single moment. It's not about "when... then... if." It's about here. It's about now. It's about this man and these kids and the people at the grocery and the doctor's office and the gas station and sitting in the church pew next to me, and wherever else God sends us.

Look at your current season in life as an opportunity. Work now to create a vision for the ministry of the home that God has entrusted to YOU.

Start with your husband. What needs of his are you setting aside until "when... then... if..."? Are you committed to praying for him? Do you have a spirit of "singing hymns of praise" while you do your chores, make dinner, care for the kids, fold his socks? What does he desire that you can take the initiative to do without him asking? What's the one thing he dreads doing that you could do for him? How can you make his mornings run smoothly and his evenings more peaceful?

Then look at your kiddos. Are you looking over them to other ministries outside the home. Are you gazing longingly at "someday"? Do you pray and sing hymns in their presence? Do you speak the word of God to them? Do you take them with you in ministry opportunities? Do you save your best for someone else, some other time, a different place?

God has given me a grand calling. What bigger words of confirmation of my ministry do I need than a positive pregnancy test? Seriously, words in the clouds would be fun. But isn't it enough that God, the creator of the universe, saw fit to put these kids in my care? Truth is, all that He has given, my "right here and now," is enough. I don't need to wait on a better calling!

one secret to peace for large (or not-so-large) families

((So, those of you with large families can stop giggling cause I just called our modest family of six "large" but if you don't already know this trick, you'll thank me--after the laughter subsides.))

I wish I could say I thought of this one myself. But I did not. This is one of the other tips I learned from my perusal of the Thomas Jefferson Education books by Oliver DeMille. It's called "the kid of the day." (You can read about the "You, not them" principle here.)

You know all those little tiffs and whines when it's time to run an errand and everyone wants to go with you. How do you choose? Or, who gets to pick what to listen to in the car, or who gets to sit in the front seat, or who gets to help mom make dinner, or who gets the first piece of cake, or who gets to hold the flashlight for dad, or who gets to go pick up the pizza and eat a free ice cream cone in the lobby while waiting for the order (seriously, this really happens, folks). Or... or... or... it never ends.

Well, unless you have a "kid of the day." 

We established a rotation and I write the child's name on the calendar so it is clearly established and there is no confusion. Who's the kid of the day? Well it must be because the calendar says so. It takes mom and dad choosing one child over the other out of the equation. So where there is a choice to be made the fussing and hurt feelings are gone for good. "Who's the kid of the day?" is the question of the moment. They know that it is not their turn today, but it will be some other day and who knows what cool thing will come up on their day. They are content to go on their way and be patient for their turn.

This also ensures that mom or dad is getting one-on-one time with each child in some type of reliable rotation. They love this because they get mom/dad's ear exclusively to themselves to say whatever they need to say. And we can give our undivided attention to that child.

We also take this opportunity to pray specifically for that child during our family Bible study at breakfast, thanking God for the blessing that they are, praying for their future spouse, and begging the heart of God to draw them to Himself.

In the past, I have had the "kid of the day" be my helper when it's time to clean up after dinner. It becomes a good training opportunity as I can focus teaching that one child the skills for the job. This is done in a fun and light-hearted way. And because of this, my older girls can clean up a kitchen single-handedly when needed. What a blessing that can be!

When it comes to running errands, the kid of the day could lose the privilege for any number of reasons: their chores aren't done, they didn't finish their studies, or they didn't get dressed that morning (yes, this happens too). In our house the privilege does not trickle down to the next kid--we found to do so can be the source of hurt feelings and resentment.

So have fun chuckling if you really have a big family and you're thinking, "Well, duh." Or have fun with your "kid of the day" and marvel at what a blessing they are!

hope

Hope is the thing with feathers that perches on the soul. --Emily Dickinson

short week, long weekend

The cooler weather has caught me unprepared. I need to schedule a day to get out the fall/winter clothes and take inventory of who needs what. Thus another year rounds the bend. Where did the summer go? I was busy with other things and I missed it. Completely.

Today marks the last day to our short week. Short week, followed by a long weekend, makes a good transition into the new school year.

Plus this weekend is our anniversary. S and I have been married for 19 years. We have been together longer than we have been apart. How is it possible that I love him more today than I did the day we married? He and I are blessed to have come from long lines of married people. I know that sounds silly. But it's rare. How thankful I am to have had a front row seat in observing our parents marriages. Because of how they have modeled self-sacrificial and longsuffering love,  we stand on their shoulders, so to speak. I pray that our kids, who see how we do this thing called marriage, see the same love and commitment that was modeled for us, even in our imperfection. And our imperfections are great. Despite our weaknesses, and only because of God's grace and mercy, I pray that they will see a glimpse of how Christ loves the church, and how much greater is His love that He would be the sacrifice that makes our salvation possible.