Mark your home as God's territory*

If you are a Christian, would anyone know that you claim the name of Christ by walking into your home?

One of my projects this spring and summer was to begin to mark our home as God's territory. I found some beautify, carved, wooden crosses at Hobby Lobby for half price, but that was just a start. I began to add some scripture in prominent locations. This is one I painted in the laundry room (remember my nemesis the laundry?). I think in the next house I will use a portion of Psalm 90:17--"establish the work of our hands." I've also wanted to use Matthew 6:33 (maybe on the kitchen soffit?) and to put the fruits of the spirit in the girls bedroom which I haven't had a chance to do yet. Maybe the next house?

I also added a painted chalkboard wall in the kitchen. It's been such a blessing to be reminded of a scripture that God has laid on my heart while working in the kitchen or when I pass by, or practice writing out a passage I've been memorizing. I'm going to miss this board in the new house.

Marking your home includes not only what you add but what you take away. Are there books, magazines, movies, artwork in your home that are displeasing to God? Get rid of them. Are there more TVs than Bibles. Maybe it's time to consider a change. Do your kids know how to respond to the shout of "O-H" but they don't know the 10 commandments? How true that was in my house. What about the music you listen to? Does it praise the worldly pursuits of the flesh or lift up the holy attributes of God? Ask and God will open your eyes, He is opening mine wider everyday.

*Mark Your Home as God's Territory is step 5 in the message by Voddie Baucham "Getting Your House in Order." You can also read more in the book Family Driven Faith.

Choosing Purposeful Simplicity for March

Well my napkin experiment of last month was a complete failure. Given my track record with the laundry we should have all seen that coming. So this month I'm going a slightly different route, I'll attempt to give up complaining.

"Do everything without complaining or arguing . . . "

(Philippians 2:14)

I cannot shake the image of the Israelites standing at the edge of the Promised Land complaining and grumbling. At every turn they complained. Passing through a parted sea, water from rock, guided by a cloud, fed manna from heaven; and none of it good enough. I suspect that I approach much of my work with the same spirit of whining and unwillingness. Even if quiet, to myself, or mumbled under my breath, I wonder how all this complaining effects the atmosphere of my home, my heath, my relationship with God? And then of course, what do my children learn from my example?

So, if I'm not complaining, how then shall I think or speak? With what shall I replace my grumbling spirit? The Bible tell me that also:

"Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things" (Philippians 4:4-8).

". . . giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ . . ." (Ephesians 5:20).

So, what if, while I folded the towels, I replaced my grumblings with with prayer for the little ones that God has entrusted to me, prayers that He might breath on them, that repentance and salvation might well up in their souls? What if, while I turned his shirts and matched his socks, I begged the heart of God for the protection and guidance for the man who wears those shirts and socks everyday? What if, instead of whining, I recited Psalms of praise to the all-knowing, purposeful Creator who has given me my portion and my cup, honoring Him for giving me exactly what I need in order to become exactly who He wants me to be? What if I simply thanked God for His faithful provisions for my family, even when we have failed to be faithful in return?

"Everything about which we are tempted to complain may be the very instrument whereby the Potter intends to shape His clay into the image of His Son--a headache, an insult, a long line at the check-out, someone's rudeness or failure to say thank you, misunderstanding, disappointment, interruption" (Elizabeth Elliot, Keep a Quiet Heart).

You see, it's the laundry. Still.

Will you all just scream if you have to read one more post about our laundry? Well I guess I can write it and you can just not read it, right? I'll feel better and I'll have no idea that you moved on to something else more entertaining. So it's a win, win.

Last week we gave the girls complete responsibility for their laundry. I'm only doing mine, Charlie's and Steve's. Awesome gig for me!

The girls had a meeting. We could hear them up in Makenna's room having a conference to decide just how this was going to work. They decided to pull their resources and their plan was that on Monday and Thursday they were each going to do a load of laundry. Makenna would do the darks, Maddie the whites, and Maya the brights. About one third of the plan worked. I'll let you guess just which third that was. The other 2/3 went undone (or at best partially started). By Friday no one had clean jammies and Maddie and Maya were out of clean clothes. So come Saturday night they were doing laundry in order to have clean clothes on Sunday.

On Monday we all agreed that this system was doomed from the start. Which brings us to Plan B. They are now each responsible for only their own laundry. They can collect the dirty laundry in their closets which means 1) they don't have to bring it down stairs every morning, 2) we're not wading through a glacier of laundry in the laundry room every day, 3) it will be clear who's not doing their work, and 4) others will not be penalized for it. Makenna will wash on Mondays, Maddie on Wednesdays, Maya on Fridays. So far so good.

As for me I need to help Maya get caught up on last weeks brights and teach her the skills to do her own laundry so she can become more independent. Maddie has the skills but not so much the desire, but I hope the lack of clean clothing and the resultant missing out on an outing or two will motivate her in time. Makenna doesn't really care to do her own laundry, but cares more that she has clean clothes.

We're baby stepping our way to independence and adulthood (the laundry only being a portion of our work) and I'll tell you this has been a hard couple of weeks. If you look at it from a spiritual standpoint, it could be because good things are happening and perhaps my resolve and consistency is under attack. We're in a spiritual battle for the hearts of our little ones. Keeping them immature and dependent well past the appropriate age for being so could keep them static in sin and spiritual infants. How much better to see our "sons in their youth be as grown-up plants, And our daughters as corner pillars fashioned as for a palace" (Ps 144:12).

You knew this wasn't just about laundry, right?

For everyone who partakes only of milk is not accustomed to the word of righteousness, for he is an infant. But solid food is for the mature, who because of practice have their senses trained to discern good and evil. Hebrews 5:13-14

If i had a million laundry baskets

it stillwouldn't be enough.

It's the Laundry, Again.

We have been so blessed with hand-me-downs and generous birthday gifts that Steve and I rarely buy clothes for the girls. We may occasionally purchase a few items for each new season or to replace a well-worn favorite or to accommodate an unexpected growth spurt. But even with the little we actually buy, somehow, those girls have a ton of clothes. It is a blessing and a curse at the same time.

I've begun to suspect that in all the laundry, I'm actually washing CLEAN clothes along with the dirty. Saturday Maya decided to "help" mom out and bring down every one's dirty laundry. She took not only the items from the laundry baskets but also all the items lying on the closet floors. What she brought down amounted to the largest pile of laundry I've ever seen and I've been doing laundry all day, every day, since.

Now I started to notice some suspicious items show up while sorting these for the wash: folded clothes.

Uh-huh, just as I thought.

Needless to say, I've had a lot of time to think about our consumer society. All the excess and accumulation only means more to manage, organize, sort, wash, dry, fold and put away.

So I've devised a plan. Well, actually, Flylady made the plan; I'm just going to be brave enough to adopt it in our house. I've made a list of the essentials and I'm packing up all the rest to see how we get along with living on less. Here are my lists for the girls (all bets are off with the boy who wore 6 sets of clothes yesterday, not counting the swim trunks):

Spring/Summer

7 pairs of socks and underwear
1 pair of jeans
1 yoga pants/sweatpants
6 pair of shorts
6 everyday shirts
2 nice outfits for church/going out
1 nice “long sleeve option”
4 summer pjs
2 bathing suits/cover up
1 hooded/zip sweatshirt
1 rain/windbreaker
1 pair of sandals
1 pair of flip flops
1 tennis/hiking shoes

Fall/Winter

7 pairs of socks and underwear
5 pair jeans
2 yoga pants/sweat pants
6 everyday shirts
2 nice outfits for church/going out
1 “long sleeved option”
4 warm pjs
1 winter coat/hat/scarf/gloves
1 pair winter boots
1 pair tennis/hiking shoes
1 pair nice shoes for church/going out

Now I will admit that I've allowed for a few exceptions for some of the favorites (and for underwear). But I scaled down the wardrobes so that they are very close to this list and their closets are no longer overflowing onto the floor and filtering out of the room.

It does look a little sparse; we're so used to looking at closets stuffed to the limits of all expectations. So I have cheated and built in a safety feature in case we chicken out: I boxed up the extras and stored them in the basement.

To further simplify the laundry, tomorrow I'm going to Wal-Mart and buying them each two towels in their own color. One to use and one to wash. They each have a hook in the bathroom where they can hang their towel. All the others—which end up being those huge beach towels—are going up on the higher shelves and we’ll wait to use those for the pool. No more using 3 towels a piece after a bath.

A Message from the Department of Passive Aggressive Disorder

Although I can't be diagnosed with Oppositional Defiant Disorder, I have, from time to time, considered diminutive, yet effectual, acts of rebellion to the life I've established for myself. A quiet dissention, so to speak.

Let us consider my time honored favorite subject once again—laundry. This time, let’s narrow the topic a bit.

Let us talk about socks.

(First, let me begin with a huge note of thanks to the old man. Last spring he got so tired of listening to me whine over laundry; listening to me persuade reluctant and frightened kids into helping with the laundry; and, being the victim of my laundry-hatred (his gentle way of spurring me on was: "Are there any clean whites?"), that he purchased two new, white, and shiny machines: one meant for washing, and one especially for drying. We got the largest ones we could find. And what a difference it has made this last year. I can now keep up with the laundry and, miracle of all miracles, the clothes are dry before the next load is even done washing. Thus I can fold and stack them in the appropriate baskets, and even put it away, before I have to switch the wet clothes into the dryer. Amazing! No more stagnant baskets. Also, as an added bonus, on the days when I neglect the laundry, I no longer have to abuse the washer with oppressively enormous loads or wait hours for the tremendous load to dry. But what about the socks?)

This is the final frontier. Some say it's space—actually, it's socks. My way of dealing with them is to not deal with them. While I fold the laundry out of the dryer, I throw the socks into the basket as I go, planning to turn and match them afterwards. Surprisingly, I never do go back to them—until a week later I realize Maddie is going out to play—in MY socks.

Forget matching those 50 pairs of tiny little socks and figuring which pair goes to which kid, first you have to turn them inside right because, apparently, when people in this house take off their socks they do so by turning them inside out.

Well, I quit. You may get your socks—washed, dried, paired and folded—you may even get YOUR socks in YOUR basket—but you'll have to turn them yourself.

And watch it, or I may stop turning your t-shirts too!

The Laundry Mambo

Some of you may remember my fight with the ugly Laundry Monster last year. If you're feeling brave, you may take a moment to refresh your memory: The Laundry Chronicles.

Since then, I have tried and tested several Laundry Theories in search of a simpiler method that actually works. Let me review The Theories and their most common problems:

1. The classic "Once A Week" model. Problem: Who has an entire day to drop out of the world and do nothing but laundry? Or, better yet, who wants to?!

2. The avant-garde "A Load A Day" method. Problem: The Stopper. A basket full of clean, unfolded laundry. Sitting. Waiting. Displacing guilt to all uninterested parties. Everything always stagnates from there.

3. The traditional, 1950'a "Do It All Myself" approach. Problem: Awful and embittering. Left husband feeling sorry for wife and mother angry at children for wearing clothing.

4. The "Dragging My Reluctant Children Kicking and Screaming Along with Me", um, I mean "Including the Family" scheme. Method: As I finished each load I would dump the basket in the middle of the living room and after lunch they were supposed to help me sort all the clothes. They were then responsible for folding and putting their stuff away. Problem is trifold: Nobody wants to do chores after lunch. A pile of five loads of laundry is frightening to a four-year-old. The kids just don't get the "whistle while you work" let's work together as a team mentality. No "spoon full of sugar" around here! We were all miserable and the laundry wasn’t getting done.

5. The ellusive "Happy Medium" technique. Method: I wash, fold and put their clothes on their assigned step. They bring down the dirty laundry in the morning and put away their own folded laundry after breakfast. Problem: There isn't one!

Why this works:
1. It is fast and easy as it is only ONE load of laundry.
2. I have willing participants in the process.
3. The Girls harbor fresh, painful memories of Method Number 4.

You may ask, "What is Steve’s job in all this?" It’s simple.
1. Stay out of my way.
2. Kick the kids back into play should they refuse to participate.
3. Don’t contribute to the mess I have to deal with, also known as, put your own dirty laundry IN the laundry basket.

The Laundry Chronicles

Just how much laundry can a family of 6 produce, you wonder. Well, I'll tell you: A LOT! It's no secret that I'm a big fan of routines. They are my peace in a chaotic world. However, there is one routine my inner brat really hates. Really! You guessed it. The Laundry. Hate it. Really. Really. Hate. It.

OK. Enough whining.

This is what happens after 5 days of ignoring my routine, which is to wash, dry, fold and put away a minimum of one load of laundry a day. I have excuses, I mean good reasons, for why I ignored my duty to the laundry monster. But you've already heard them all.

7:00 am

• Get up, make the bed, shower and get dressed
• Enter the living room, see laundry on couch and remember 5 loads of laundry waiting to be folded and put away
• Put a load of darks into the wash
• Unload the dishwasher
• Put the darks into the dryer

8:00 am

• Dig out one outfit from the pile for Maya
• Make breakfast, feed the baby
• Load the dishwasher
• Add one load to the pile from the dryer
• Take Makenna to school

9:00 am

• Start movie for the girls
• Spend 15 minutes avoiding the living room
• Fold and put away approximately 1 load of laundry
• Wrestle one diaper onto baby
• Put baby down for nap
• Make a snack for the girls

10:00 am

• Take one phone call
• Fold 2 loads
• Get drinks for the girls
• Answer email
• Consider donating remaining laundry to Good Will
• Put away folded laundry

11:00 am

• Get the mail
• Do internet seach on laurndry services
• Fold remaining loads of laundry becuase hiring a laundress is cost prohibitive

11:30 am

• Put away laundry
• Take an oath to never let the laundry go again