Doubts: Parenting or otherwise.

Unless the LORD builds the house,
its builders labor in vain.
Unless the LORD watches over the city,
the watchmen stand guard in vain.

In vain you rise early
and stay up late,
toiling for food to eat—
for he grants sleep to those he loves.

Sons are a heritage from the LORD,
children a reward from him.

Like arrows in the hands of a warrior
are sons born in one's youth.

Blessed is the man
whose quiver is full of them.
They will not be put to shame
when they contend with their enemies in the gate.

Psalm 127:1-5

In our imperfection we doubt. Are we doing the right thing in our jobs, for our spouses, and for our children. Have we made the right choice in our relationships with extended family or neighbors. Is our discipline effective, have we made the right impression on our children? The list never ends.

I can tell you one thing you don't have to doubt. Your children are a blessing! They are a gift from God. You don't have to doubt the impact that you have on this world if you have them. They are your impact. A multi-generational one. Think that through. Your children will have spouses of their own one day. And their own children. Who will then produce your great grand children and so forth. They are our faith bearers to the next generation. What a responsibility. What a privilege. There is no job or task more important than this one that has been laid before you.

Our culture begs us to plan in great detail our child's path to college. We dream about their future success. What is your dream for your children? Medicine? Law? Athletics? We're expected to begin planning and saving for college even while this child is still in the womb. Every day we monitor their homework and fuss over their grades. We'll bend over backwards to make sure they get this opportunity or have that experience. They'll need these things to look good on college applications. They'll need to be strong in this or that other thing to get scholarships. They'll need to know this person or work that internship if they want to have influence and power.

Now, in all that planning, what are we doing to mentor our children to be a good spouse? How are we training them in our faith so that they can pass that along to their children when they are a parent? We need to encourage each other, in between all those good intentions, to be as deliberate about training them to be spouses and parents as we are about all those other things.

We must talk to them about unconditional love. The kind that moves you beyond the reach of cupid's arrow and starts with a decision, a daily choice to love no matter what and for always. The Bible tells us that as mothers we are to "train the younger women to love their husbands and children" (Titus 2). Train them to love. You and I know that it doesn't always come naturally. Love is a choice. Love is action that benefits others before ourselves.

We must train our children to discern good character and to not only seek it out, but to instill it in our own children as well. We must teach them what qualities make a God-honoring spouse so that they might be one and so that they might choose one. What does the Bible have to say about being a man, being a women? Do your know what the Bible says about being a husband, being a wife? It is not silent on the matter and in most cases it is contrary to what our culture accepts and what it glorifies. We must be deliberate. We must be diligent.

"Love: An act of the will, accompiand by emotion that leads to action on behalf of its object."